Saturday, 24 September 2011

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Thursday, 22 September 2011

I remember

It was over twenty years ago when my Mum died. Like many before and since she was diagnosed with cancer and soon she was gone. I find as time has gone on I've remembered less and less, I even find myself feeling guilty about that sometimes. Is that normal?

Even so It's funny how some things stick clear in my mind. I can remember vividly getting the call from my Nan to tell me my Mum had been diagnosed. I remember Tracy sat next to me on the bed in the shared house we lived in, the Yamaha DT125LC outside and the fact my dear old Nan couldn't stop crying. I also remember thinking It's probably not that big a deal. I was of course very much mistaken. It was a big deal, it truly was and sometimes still is.

The picture above was posted by a friend of my sisters (she's the one in the middle) on facebook today. For me this is a most wonderful thing. I never got to hang on to many photos of my Mum after she died and this is one I had never seen until today. The mixture of joy and sorrow it shot through my heart has been quite something. Not a nasty something, just a something. I find myself yet again thinking back and remembering my Mum. The way she would hold me and tell me everything would be ok, that look in her eye so filled with unconditional love, so unmistakable, so real.

As the years have passed I have, from time to time found myself forgetting this stuff, even sometimes forgetting my Mum. Tonight as I sit here this is not the case, not even nearly. And this is a good thing, an amazing this.  I was told everything would be ok, and you know what? it is.

Tuesday, 20 September 2011

Found in our bin shed

The image on the right was found in our bin shed. I have resisted the temptation to keep it, nevertheless it's an intresting thing to look at.

I'm not the sort of chap that claims to know anything about art. If this is what art is I've got to say its all a bit on the odd side. Even so its an interesting thing to look at.

So with that in mind my contribution to the world of art, at least on my blog is this. I don't have a clue what it's called or even who made it. I don't even know if it's still in my bin shed. What I do know is it's an interesting thing to look at. Did I say that already?

Sunday, 11 September 2011

With my arse hanging out the back of a hospital gown

Being the tenth anniversary of 9/11, I posted a thing on facebook today asking what people were doing ten years ago today. The answers were as you might expect wide and varied, and as is often the case it got me thinking about what I was up to a decade ago.

For me things were not that great. I had developed an infection in my groin and leg as the result of intravenous drug use. In Gloucester Hospital with suction packs all over the place and hardly able to stand let alone walk, I remember seeing it on the telly in the smoking room (yep they had them then) and thinking wow, what a thing, now how can I get out of here and score.

On more then one occasion I could be found making a break for Gloucester town centre  wheeling a dip behind me. I remember thinking how unfair it was that they "made" me do this instead of prescribing me injectable morphine. This was a common theme for me. It's nice it's not like that anymore.   

Tuesday, 6 September 2011

Everything and nothing

The last few days have been nice, very nice to be honest. Together with the Boy and Mrs D I've spent some time in a caravan near Weston super mare. I've done everything and nothing all at the same time but now it's over, at least very nearly over. As the minutes tick away the realisation floods in that this time tomorrow I'll be back at work. This I must admit is a bit of a bugger right about now.

Nevertheless tomorrow I will return to work, I'll do the best I can do and I've got to say there is a more then fair chance I'll enjoy it. This is the way it's been for quite a while now and my hope is that it'll stay this way for sometime to come.

For now I plan to make my way to the industrial standard narrow band light box at my local hospital and work on topping up my sun tan. A treatment I have for my skin that allways seems to leave Mrs D a little on the envious side.

Good enough really since she's off to see Dolly Parton tonight and I most surely am not. Without sounding too much of a girl, I'd go if I could.

Back to my point. A few days doing everything and nothing have been great. So much so I thing I'll do it again.