Sunday, 13 June 2010

Built for comfort, not speed.

I've just spent the last hour cleaning not only my car but also Mrs D's. The sun blazing at a little after noon made this a very warm task indeed. Croc's and a pair of shorts were for-sure a good idea, a black T-shirt was not. Simple I hear you say, just take the dam T-shirt off and enjoy the sun. If only. It's a popular misconception that self obsession around body image is limited to the female of the species, this is simply not true. At least not in my experience.

I guess it's that part of me that still fights the idea of any sort of change. I'm a forty-two year old who spends almost every minute of my working life behind a desk, not the teenager who works on a building site, not any more and not for a long time. But maybe that's only half the picture, just maybe in truth, I'm still a little too worried about what other people think. Still trying to present an image that's not quite the truth.

So, what's the answer? Turns out it was super simple yet again. The time has come to release the belly and hold my head high. To concede to myself that despite what my head might be telling me, the truth is I'm built for comfort, not speed. And that's OK.
To be honest, once I got my shirt off and started washing the car, I quite enjoyed myself. Its funny how self obsession will creep in but if you chose to ignore the bastard, it seems to get board and bugger off. My hope is that today I have taken on more tiny step towards freedom. Freedom from the greatest prison of all, freedom from my head.